Long- Lasting Happiness

Updated: Jan 18

Everybody has times where you are super happy or super sad. Things that put you on a high could be a new car, going on vacation, or a new relationship. However, there are also things that put us through a low such as, a breakup/ divorce, a loss in the family/ friend, getting into a car accident, or losing your job. Yet, somehow we find ourselves always coming back to this medium mental state, not extremely happy, but also not extremely depressed.


Rate your happiness level from last month on a scale of 1-10. Now, do that again with the past 3 years, and 1 more time your whole lifetime. Now add those three numbers together and divide by 3. For example: My Happiness this month has been an 8. The last 3 years it has been an 7.5, and my entire lifetime is a 6.5. Now if I add them up this would give me, 22. I divide 22 by 3 and my average medium level of happiness is a 7.3. This is an estimate, and roughly the number I judge by on where my medium happy number is.


How exactly can we change that? Become happier on a longer lasting period. instead of making decisions based off of immediate wants, make decisions based off of values. This will help get you happier longer versus something like a new car, or a vacation. There are 3 different factors into gaining a longer lasting happy life.


#1 Variety-

Give yourself Variety in your life. Whoever your favorite music artist is, instead of listening to them everyday, put your favorite songs and artists into a special album and only play it when you are feeling down, or need a boost. If you get coffee everyday, try not getting it everyday at Starbucks. Even if you aren't willing to give that up, choose different types of coffee don't get your favorite one every day. Take different routes to work and break it up. Create different variety throughout your life, and you will appreciate those things a lot more.


#2 Mindfulness-

Be mindful of all things going on around you. If you are on the beach, close your eyes and really connect with your surroundings. Smell the salty water, feel the warm sun touch your skin, Taste that refreshing fruit on a hot day. Listen to the waves crashing in the background. This doesn't have to be at the beach. This can be at home, in the car, at a coffee shop, your local hair or nail salon. Completely take a minute to submerse yourself into what is going on around you.


#3 Gratitude-

Appreciate the small moments and things around you. This can be when your Mother sends you a simple text letting you know she is thinking about you, Coming home from a long day at work and your Significant other has dinner cooking or maybe even cooked and ready on the table. Maybe its when you are sitting on the couch on a lazy Sunday Mid-Afternoon and your child is playing with his/her stuffed animals pretending to be their parent. Smile and appreciate the tiniest of moments. Maybe your favorite song came on the radio, whatever it is that gave you a small sense of happiness, savor that.


Making sure that you put your phone down when spending quality time with friends and family is also important. This means close those social media apps out and try not to divide your attention. Challenge yourself for the first 30 minutes and the last 30 minutes of your day to keep your phone down.


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Amber Brock

Self-Development Coach for all Women. 

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